A poem I wrote during one of my 40 minutes of english class time slots that my teacher allocates to Spoken Word Poetry and to attempting to get us young ones to become poets. Needless to say, I was not feeling inspired that day. Instead I wrote down all that I was thinking about at the time, and created a very confusing poem encompassing it all.
The sky is blue,
So is Krystofer’s shirt.
I’m not feeling inspired, should I simply make “skirt” rhyme with “shirt”?
Or should I put more effort into this poem?
I am divided between ambition and boredom.
.
But I strive for ambition
And I wish for perfection
And I hope that, one day, I can stand tall,
Attracting attention,
And not feel my hands shake and my lips quiver.
.
I look forward to the future,
To the day I can stand outside in the winter, not judged for the fact that
I like snow.
I like silence.
I do not need to occupy every single minute of my life with noise and colour and movement.
.
I push myself to stand and speak,
Summoning whatever feeble courage I can gather in my tiny hands,
Feeling it slip onto the floor where I sink.
I fear I can only float so long.
I use songs to give me the strength to move on.
I’m scared I’m wrong,
What if I won’t want to stay?
I can’t turn around, there’s only one road now.
.
Behind me, my past will be a small box,
Sitting on the tiles of my former house.
Mocking me, daring me to hop on that plane,
See if I truly believe I’ll never be back again.
.
I’m scared all these dark and confined spaces
That won’t let me grow,
Will somehow affect who I’ll be when I go.
22/01/15